Tears for fears.

I cried last night. I'm not sure why.

I was up too late, and my mum got mad. I was on the laptop, mum took it. I'll find it in the normal place, I know it. But that doesn't change the fact that I cried.

I cried.

I cried.
That doesn't happen to me. When I cry, I don't acknowledge it. I ignore it, it goes away, and no one bothers me.

Last night, I saw myself.
I passed by my mirror and I saw my face. Little red eyes, a blotchy face, tear tracks.
I never look like that. Not ever.
I don't want to look like that, to be the type of person who lets her emotions run rampant. I'm not that kind of person. Nothing I ever say or show is real. I fake it, only so my family and friends don't worry. I need to put on a happy face, or I'll ruin everything. There are only a few people in this world that have seen me with my guard down, and I can count them on one hand. I love them all dearly, but none of them are really around anymore.

I'm lonely.