OMGWTFBBQBLOGGGERS GET PAID ASDFGHJKL

WHEN DID THIS START?!
I'm serious, folks! Look at these stats!
Jason Kottke- $5,300/month
the Fug girls- $6,240/month
The LOLcats- $5,600/month
Overheard in New York- $8,100/month
Perez Hilton - $111,000/month
THAT LAST GUY ALSO HAS A LINE OF PRODUCTS THAT ARE SOLD IN HOT TOPIC AND CLAIRE'S BOUTIQUE. What the fuck, man?! Since when does playing around on the internet constitute as an actual job? I spend at least 60% of my awake time worshipping this ungodly information box, and I don't see a dime! By those figures, I should be at LEAST a millionaire by now! I mean, I'm building a Gaia Online avatar empire! I'm pretty much the Tektek Dream Avatar goddess (I did not coin that phrase, someone else did. About me. Booyah!), so why am I not getting paid?
Then it hit me. My blog is private! I need to go public! Sage, mark your calender. This is the LAST TIME I am posting in a private blog that only one other person ever sees! Dark Spot is closed, bitches! My personal life is about to be blown wide open!
Not that anyone gives a rats ass. I mean, half the time I'm on the 'net, it's at 2 am and I'm in my nightshirt. Plus, I don't really go anywhere. I just go to comic book stores and Barnes and Noble. Sometimes I work for my dad. Blah, anyway, I'm going to start up a new blog under a new account. I'll Myspace you a link as soon as I get it up. Ooer.